Happiness is a state of mind. As such, you CHOOSE to be happy in whatever circumstances.
- You can't pick a career thinking it would make you happy.
- You can't find a spouse thinking that he or she would make you happy.
- You can't drink yourself into happiness.
- You can't exercise your way to happiness.
- You can't buy a home that would make you happy.
The only way to be happy is to decide to be happy!
Happiness isn't a thing. You can't find it. Happiness is not a result. There is nothing in your life that could produce happiness. The only way to be happy is to change your mindset.
A man and a woman get married. The woman might say that her wedding day was the "happiest day of her life." Five years later, she's talking about divorcing her husband. Why? Well, according to her, her husband doesn't "make her happy anymore." What happened? Did she leave her happiness at the church when she got married? Why isn't she happy anymore? Did her happiness only come at her wedding day and didn't follow her into her marriage?
You get a new job. You call up everybody telling them how happy you are. Three years later, the job is making you miserable. What happened? I thought getting the job made you happy? Why didn't your happiness continued into your work life?
You lose 50 pounds. You're happy! Your family is happy for you. One year later, you're miserable and gained 50-plus pounds. What happened?
You moved into a new home. You're happy! Six months later, you're complaining about life. What happened to your happiness?
You finally received your college degree. You're happy! Four months later, you're drinking yourself into misery. What happened?
There is nothing in this life that would make you happy. Only YOU decide what you're going to be happy about. Happiness is learned, not inherited. Happiness is a skill. It's something you must master. It cannot be given to you.
When you were a kid, you were happy about certain things. You were happy when you got your way, right? Why? Because you were taught to be happy whenever you got your way and to be miserable if you didn't. Whenever Mommy or Daddy caved in and got you what you wanted, your parents were teaching you what to be happy about. In this case, you were taught to be happy by being spoiled!
If you were raised in poverty, you were taught to be miserable! Everybody else had new cars, cool clothing, could eat out any time they wanted, had jobs that "made them happy," and they didn't seem to have a care in the world. But your parents always talked about how miserable they are in their poverty. Now you're being taught to be miserable in your poverty -- which means that you're also being taught to be happy when you "make it big" in life. So until you are able to get all the nice things in life, you'll be miserable.
Thanks, Mom and Dad, for teaching me how to be happy only when I'm able to get nice things!
Before I got married, I have determined that I would be happy whether single or married. I didn't want to depend on someone else making me happy. And I wanted to marry someone who also determined to be content whether single or married. Well, I suppose our determination made God "happy" because my wife and I found each other. We've been married for almost ten years and have two children together. To this day, I don't depend on her for happiness. I was happy without her and I am happy with her. I was going to be happy either way because I CHOSE to be happy either way.
Whether I have a lot of money or little money, I'm going to be happy. Whether with children or without children, I'm going to be happy. Whether single or married, male or female, fat or skinny, healthy or sick, I WILL be happy.
Now, does happiness mean that I will never be sad about anything? Of course, not! However, what you choose to be happy about will also determine what you would be sad about.
My grandmother passed away recently. I was actually HAPPY for her. Why? Because she was in a nursing home for 10 years. She was away from her home and from all the activities she previously enjoyed. Since she was also a stroke victim, she wasn't the same person. She was barely able to talk or comprehend certain things. Why continue that kind of life? It was time for her to rest in her heavenly Father's arms.
Being in her situation was actually sad for me! Yes, she was alive, but what kind of life was she living???
So, on the night before she passed, I visited her hospital bed and prayed that the Lord would take her so she would have peace. On the next day, she saw her children for the last time and passed away.
That made me happy. I wasn't happy that she died. I was happy that she is now with Jesus.
Obviously, you see that I have a positive view on death.
Yes, you're going to get sad at something -- initially. Yes, you're going to get angry at things -- initially. Yes, you're going to feel hopeless at times, stressed out, overwhelmed, you name it. But if you choose to REMAIN angry or sad or stressed or whatever, then that is your CHOICE. You're not forced to live in misery. You only choose to live that way.
- Stop shopping for happiness. You can't buy it.
- Stop looking for that "dream job" thinking that it would make you happy. It won't.
- Stop looking for "Mister Perfect" or "Ms. Perfect" thinking that you would be happy. Nobody could make you happy.
Only YOU choose to be happy in whatever state you're in.
Choose happiness! Choose peace! Choose to be content in this life no matter where you find yourself in.